I've been somewhat dreading my planned colonoscopy. My last one, about 12 years ago, involved fasting for a month, drinking a horse trough full of diluted battery acid, weeks on the commode, and a serious conversation with myself about my agreeing to the procedure. The procedure was a cake-walk, since the "I don't care" medication insured I didn't get to see the medical students, and other spectators gather to critique my posterior.
This one, so far, seems much different. The medieval horse trough prep is replaced by a 16 ounce flask and two small bottles of what looks like insecticide in a brown bottle. The nurse, after my doctor appointment, insured me it's not nearly as bad as it once was, but I'm a little suspicious, since she doesn't look old enough to even spell colonoscopy.
So, today it's a liquid diet, with the instructions of no dairy, alcohol, liquids of a certain color and the wait until this evening when I drink the insecticide, or whatever it is. After that, I sit, and sit, and sit, and sit, maybe watch some television, sit, and sit ,and sit...wait four hours, complete the above procedure again, and finally the encore: two enemas. I'll be so clean there will be a draft like wind through a cave.
Tomorrow morning I have the supreme pleasure of two more enemas two hours before my procedure and my favorite part: the "I don't care" shot with a short nap. After that, my wife gets to bring me home. I'm sure I'll either be very sleepy, or a rambling idiot.
I had complained to my doc, the last time (and I mean The Last Time) I had The Procedure, that the pills he had prescribed were not having the benefit of the previous prescription.
ReplyDeleteWhen I awoke, his first words were that they had found something "interesting". That's scary.
Then he told me he found the pills, undigested, lodged in the lining of my colon. And the prep liquid has washed out everything but them.
Good luck.
ReplyDeleteWhile the only people who enjoy a colonoscopy prep are the mentally ill wierdos it's important to have a good prep. There's no point in submitting to the procedure for an inconclusive report or worse yet a report that says they see nothing bad because the poor prep obscured things that needed to be seen. Yes...the procedure is a cake walk compared to the prep. But without the prep the procedure is worse than useless.
ReplyDeleteThis is my second colonoscopy. With each one, I learn something new on making the prep easier.
DeleteIf I may be so bold, what are your out of pocket costs? You're on Medicare, right?
ReplyDeleteI never had one, although many doctors have tried to push me into getting it done.
Best of luck..
My out of pocket costs, if you don't include the costs for Part B, and my supplemental policy monthly cost, was $83 copay for the prep kit. I'm not on an advantage plan, but from what I know about those plans, they should cover the costs, but you don't get to choose the doctor you may want.
DeleteHere's hoping it all went well . . .
ReplyDeleteTwo polyps, which were removed. This determines the recommended repeat for a colonoscopy is five years away.
DeleteThe procedure went well. The doctor found a small area of diverticulosis other than the polyps.
Glad it went well!
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