In Case You've Wondered

My blog is where my wandering thoughts are interspersed with stuff I made up. So, if while reading you find yourself confused about the context, don't feel alone. I get confused, too.

If you're here for the stories, I started another blog:

One other thing: sometimes I write words you refuse to use in front of children, or polite company, unless you have a flat tire, or hit your thumb with a hammer.

I don't use them to offend; I use them to embellish.

Monday, October 17, 2011

I Want My Money Back

By my calculations, 40% of the money I've paid in Federal Income Taxes has been wasted, so I want it back. I know just asking would probably bring some nasty letter from the government, so maybe, I should come up with some viable options for them to compensate me for their error. Here are a few I've thought would be fair:
-Cut my taxes by 40%, or allow me to not pay any taxes for 40% of the rest of my working years.
-Deed me a few acres in Yellowstone National Park. I could open a little souvenir shop and a snow cone stand, but it would have to be next to Old Faithful. Oh yeah, I'd get to shoot bears if they dug in my trash. Bears and smelly tourists.
-Let me charge for parking at any White House Event. I'd be fair (just like them) and only charge $50 per car.
-Allow me to garnish the wages of members of Congress and other high ranking officials. "Dear Sir/Madam: Due to wasteful spending by you, and your predecessors, 40% of your salary shall be paid by the tenth day of each month until full compensation is achieved. A fee of 1.5% per month shall be charged for late payments for a maximum 18% annual fee.
-Let me charge any politician for any of my time they waste on television. Again, I'd be fair. If I like you, $85 an hour. If not $200,000 per 30 second spot. Just like the networks. Fair, is fair.

I can think of other things, such as a usage fee for any private firm that uses political power to get a sweet deal, like Nancy Pelosi's family.

I want my money back.

No comments:

Post a Comment