One Night At The Beach

It wasn't uncommon for my brothers,friends and I to pile into cars and go somewhere...anywhere, just to get out and see what there was to see. It could be anywhere, but one night we decided on the beach.

The beach was around 30 miles away. At night, when there wasn't a holiday, the beach could have long stretches where there was nobody to be found. That's what we looked for. Not that were anti-social; we didn't want to disturb anyone, or be disturbed. We might want to shoot some fireworks, or pistols. That night was just to get out and fritter away some time.

We pooled our money, piled into a friend's van, grabbed a few six-packs of beer and took off for the beach. We listened to music on the way, which was a mixture of Edgar Winter, The J-Giles Band and any FM we could pick up on the radio. Eight track was the  technology, so the songs would have a skip where the tracks changed. Some would fade out and fade in on the next track. Others would just switch, which was an accepted annoyance. After all, it was stereo and affordable stereo was only  a little over ten years old.

We arrived at the beach a little before midnight. As we climbed from the van, I noticed flashes of light on the horizon. Nocturnal thunderstorms were forming on the sea breeze front. It was the nightly summer event where the cooler air from the land lifted the warmer air over the Gulf of Mexico. Lightning flashes would light the entire clouds, which climbed as I watched. The light northerly breeze was keeping the mosquitoes at bay and only allowed small lazy waves to break near the beach. The  wind would eventually completely calm the Gulf, but that was hours away. For now, the occasional wave break quietly broke the silence.

I looked at the bright stars and hazy brilliance of the Milky Way. This was a treat, since the usual night sky of the city hid all but the brightest stars. Opportunities like this were rare, so I spent a few moments just staring in amazement.

Eventually, I looked back towards the Gulf. My eyes were now accustomed to the dark, which offered a better view of the water. There was something different. It was though there was a strong, distant light  reflecting off the waves as they broke. I turned towards the land and back towards the water. Someone spoke: "Look at the waves; they're glowing." They were. There was some type of bioluminiscent organism in the water. The waves disturbed whatever it was, and the result was a flash of greenish blue light.

I had to get closer. I walked to the waters edge and marveled at the sight. Fish left streaks in the water. The occasional wave would light like a dim fluorescent tube. My footprints in the wet sand remained for a few moments. I waded to my ankles and created my own universe with the slightest movement. Large streaks out between the sand bars were the larger predators on the hunt. I imagined it was a feast, since their prey had no place to hide.

For about an hour, it was as though we were visiting another planet. The glowing water and thunderstorms on the horizon were as alien as any planet imaginable. Swarming mosquitoes brought us back to reality as the wind became lighter. We didn't have any repellent and our beer was gone; it was time to go.

That was the first and last time I saw the "glowing waves". Maybe I should get out more; take some time just to go see what there is to see. Next time I'll bring some mosquito repellent.

You Should Go Read This

Ray doesn't post real often, but his posts have quality. This one is a good one.

I'm Looking For a Term

Have you ever commented on public forum and it was the same reaction you would get if you farted at a funeral? No comments. Everybody gets real quiet, as if they hope you go away. Eventually the comment disappears at the bottom of the page, due to new posts, which appear one after another as if they're trying to bury your comment.

Okay. It might just be me, but I doubt it, so there has to be a term for this.

It's A Beautiful Day Today

There's no other way to describe today. The temperature this morning was around 50 degrees, with a light northerly breeze. The humidity was low and the air had the hint of crispness that later Fall will bring. In my part of the world, this type of day is rare and much appreciated after dealing with the cruel heat and humidity.

The Paradox

I think it's safe to write that just about everyone knows someone with a substance abuse problem. There's plenty to be found and the odds are against not knowing someone that is having a problem.

I have the opinion that substance abuse problems are extensions of mental problems. The abuse is a reaction and the real problem may never be addressed because of the carnage of substance abuse. The damage to family members and friends is beyond repair, so the result is the complete destruction of the substance abuser. They end up with only one solution and the solution can never be changed.

Here's the paradox: When the person that abuse substances reaches the point their life is in jeopardy, the people that they really need are probably gone. Their friends and family have reached the point they won't, or can't, offer any more help. They've had enough and may be dealing with emotional disorders they acquired during their attempts to help.

So, is their a solution? I don't know, but I do know that the friends and families of substance abusers are unique in their experience. They see the slow motion train wreck and are affected by their observation. They grieve their loss daily and have little hope. Their sorrow is accentuated with anger and horror. Their resentment eats away at their emotional health like an acid. They wonder why this happened and sometimes feel guilt, even though they have done nothing wrong. If physical abuse is involved, they live in fear, which is horrible to experience and the results are rarely good. 

One thing I do know is that the "oxygen mask" analogy fits best: You have to save yourself first. You can't help someone else if you are succumbing to your own reactions or allowing the poor decisions of another to destroy your ability to survive. This means spending time examining your reactions and learning to not allow them to destroy your emotional health. It's tougher than it appears and the necessary resources can be hard to find. They're there, but you have to make the effort to find them. Otherwise, you might find you too are lured into using a substance to help you cope. At this point, the problem perpetuates and the legacy of another generation is of substance abuse.